Director Dina Facklis and a smart Second City Theatricals ensemble have spared audiences yet another night of done-to-death stories about dating traumas and men’s foibles. Instead four women and Joe Canale–someone has to move furniture–show how a sassy gay friend might have changed the lives of Shakespeare’s ingenues, including Juliet: “You’re 14! Look at your choices! Compared to you, Britney Spears has the wisdom of Eleanor Roosevelt!” Even familiar subjects–motherhood, tampons, mammograms–seem fresh in the hands of these performers, diverse in type but unfailingly in sync. Their singing needs work, but the comedy is perfect, with laughs flowing as freely as a pitcher of cosmos. Through 9/3: Thu 7:30 PM, Fri 10 PM, Sat 9 PM. No show 8/11-8/13. Metropolis Performing Arts Centre, 111 Campbell, Arlington Heights, 847-577-2121. $22-$27.