Teenage Sports Parade Goes to College!, Teenage Sports Parade, at Second City, Donny’s Skybox Studio. Will the world ever run out of postpubescent boys doing poo-poo, butt-fucking, bearded-guy-in-a-dress mega dreck? You want to violate taboos? Great. Move consciousness forward. Whatever. But please, find some new material!
For anybody who isn’t bored to death with these endless assaults, here’s the gist of this show: five guys (Kyle Dolan, Joel Gray, Tony Mendoza, Mike Sheehan, and Josh Walker, directed by Dan Izzo) with animal icons on their T-shirts and tighty-whiteys, led by a mannequin head taped to a remote-control car, are “sentenced” to community college as a punishment for unnamed crimes. Each skit, no matter what its basis, quickly devolves into a visual gag about anal sex, pubic hair, and the like. And how’s this for dialogue: “I just paid $200 for dinner and she wouldn’t even show me her hoo-has!” “Really? That’s why I masturbate to porn!” Even Beavis and Butt-head had more story to fall back on.
There’s nothing redeeming about any of the performances, so what’s left? Even the head taped to the car gets old after about five minutes. If Chicago has a large enough pool of repressed folks with the emotions or intellect of ten-year-old-boys, and they can sneak out of the house at night, there may be an audience for this. Otherwise I just don’t see it.