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Two abortions are depicted onstage in this send-up of evangelical Christian haunted houses that use scenes of sinners in hell to scare visitors into “piety.” One abortion is performed by a rabid stem-cell addict who bites into a pregnant woman’s abdomen in order to devour her fetus. In the other a woman aborts the Christ child, accidentally screwing up the timing of the Rapture and causing a Super Soaker full of stage blood to shoot from her crotch. There’s also a bloody miscarriage, and the very funny Paul Brittain pretends to huff paint and have a seizure. If you’re still reading, you know whether you’d love the show or hate it. I don’t buy the tragically hip theory that gross-out comedy is more evolved than funny comedy, but the mock church-bulletin program is painstakingly clever, and there’s free juice and cookies. Through 10/29: Fri midnight. Playground Theater, 3209 N. Halsted, 773-728-1682. $10.