Author Archives: Leah Eskin

We met Chris Latas behind the counter of Chris’s Hot Dogs on North Halsted. His bright uniform seemed prepared to fill the service industry’s standing order for deep-fry and quick-serve. But our Quality Control Fashion Inspectors had a few questions for the man in the paper hat. Was this outfit able to deliver service with […]

We met Logan Fenley riding north on the number 11. His wrapped, snapped, and capped getup blared warning for blustery blasts to give right-of-way. But our Fashion Chiefs, ever wary of the smoldering ember, wondered if the tough talk reduced to a mere smokescreen. Fenley turns out in what fire fighters call turnout gear: charcoal […]

We met Nicole Pacheco training to stock the salad bar at Whole Foods. Her veggie-spattered apron and disposable gloves swore they were diligently doing their duty. But our Fashion Inspectors wondered: Was her entire uniform kosher? Was it putting in an honest day’s labor or was something fishy going on? They peeled back the layers […]

We met Crystal Rivera, 6, and Barbie, 34, rising like Venus Junior and her protege from the waves of Lake Michigan. Crystal’s suit announced its readiness to swim to the rescue, while its open-tummied construction suggested more interest in beach blanket bingo. Our Fashion Marines launched an amphibious assault to determine if her mission could […]

We met vet William Belk at the K mart, stocking up on provisions. His Army-issue two-piece crouched ready to stalk the urban jungle. But closer inspection turned up some nonregulation details. Was this uniform with the program–or on some kind of infiltration mission? Our Fashion Intelligence unit undertook a thorough investigation. The official story begins […]

We found Kirt Brown doing time at the Brickyard Shopping Center, shuffling down the long corridors, shackled to his mom. His uniform–supersized, soft, and slouchy–mumbled something about classroom comfort. But our Fashion Wardens aren’t easily fooled. They isolated the look in solitary until it spilled the whole sorry tale. The primary suspect: long shorts. Their […]

We met Adam Thesz en route to his favorite fashion outlet–the Omni Super Store. Thesz stops there regularly to restock on high-quality plastic sacks, the ones he swears make the snappiest and most durable booties. Rolling by on his low-velocity velo, Thesz’s protective headgear, eyewear, snowgear, and raingear seem to tread function-over-form tracks: “Fully dressed, […]

We discovered Jim and Sue Gill braving the line for Passion Fish. Their outfits–two sets of prerumpled weekendwear–were rigged for a long evening slouched in folding chairs. Though everything seemed foursquare and shipshape, our Fashion Explorers, ever curious, ever cautious, scouted around to chart the territory. Both outfits might have been poached from wardrobe at […]

We met this art dealer posing with her paintings at an opening soiree. Her outfit, short and to the point, whittled down the cocktail party’s universal little black dress code to its bare essentials. Our Fashion Gestapo, alarmed by her terse statement, took an interest in hearing more. Their interrogation turned up a suspiciously serpentine […]

We met Christina Eason stationed outside the Cozy Cloud Cottage on the fifth floor of Marshall Field’s downtown store, where the wait to whisper in Santa’s ear had ebbed to 30 minutes. Her sparkle-spangled suit caroled seasonal high spirits, though the rolled-up sleeves and cuffs conceded to the temporary, and corporate (one size fits most), […]

We caught a glimpse of this shopper on a flyby from out of town, flitting past an Oak Street bank with impressive speed, despite her luggage. The yellow blur of her passing outfit, with its simple lines and oversized accessories, chirped “Girls’ day in the big city.” Savvy shoppers detect markings of a member of […]