Steve Albini sums up the food blog he launched in March as “What I made Heather for dinner,” going on to explain that its name comes from his penchant for announcing the meals he brings his partner in bed by imitating the voice of Food Network celeb chef Mario Batali. Known for his strong views about music, Albini’s just as opinionated about food: “Vegeta [an eastern European powdered broth] is the shit” and stick blenders are “the absolute stone nuts,” while suburban Italian restaurants hawking “Free Giant Garlic Bread! Meatballs As Big As Your Head!” inspire him with “Mama Mia! douche chills.” A skilled home cook, he improvises his dishes—lots of pastas and spring rolls—and frequently experiments with ingredients, making do with what they have on hand. In a representative entry from May 19, with brats and house-smoked bacon from Paulina Meat Market on hand, he comes up with “Team Pork” and tomatoes over farfalle. Out of milk, he decides to use coconut milk and egg to coat the farfalle and serves it with the meat mixture and Parmesan. “Heather liked it but said the pasta could have used more flavor, and when I mentioned the coconut milk she said it was like a negative ingredient,” he writes. “Like a Flavor Elf that robbed Team Pork. Little coconut asshole. Back to your elf hole. I’m pouring that shit out.” —Kate Schmidt