Pretty much the only non-money-bearing Christmas card I look forward to is the one from the friendly folks at Drag City. Here’s what they sent this year:

It’s an advent calendar entitled “A Countdown to Ecstasy!,” and despite having passed through the hands of the Chicago post office it actually arrived at my apartment today, the date the first door was supposed to be opened:

I’ve taken the liberty of looking behind all the rest of the doors. I think it’s fair to say that Bill O’Reilly would not enjoy Drag City’s dirty, dirty holiday sentiments, at least not in public. I won’t spoil the surprise for anyone, but let’s just say that the picture behind the door on Christmas Day shows someone giving a very special present. To themselves.

Despite the raunch factor, this year’s card pales in comparison to the sacrilegious hilarity of the 2007 edition, which portrays Nazareth’s most gifted outfielder doing what he does best: