I’m fairly certain that the casting call for VH1’s Rock of Love Bus with Bret Michaels doesn’t involve Bret Michaels actually rolling into town on a bus to steal our city’s (trashiest) women, but in this crazy mixed-up world of ours, who knows? If the idea of spending quality time on a bus with Bret Michaels appeals to you, be at the Mansion tomorrow at 11:30 PM. Or get to the center of things and go see a therapist.

(Disclaimer: I actually love Poison and was once moved to tears at a Poison concert by the potent blend of “Every Rose Has Its Thorn,” half a fifth of Jim Beam, and getting punched in the back of the head by an angry hillbilly.)