I don’t want to talk about the forces that led me on Saturday to the South Loop Club, probably the most obnoxious bar I’ve ever wandered into. But it was the same imp of the perverse that possessed me to try Crunk Punch that made me agree to order something off the Red Bull drink menu, which was touted on a giant banner slung above the door. Let’s see, a Bullgarita? No. A Bull Shit? Uh-uh. How about a Slutty Bull: Jagermeister, peach schnapps, and the energy drink that’s poisoning our youth?

The $8 bane is pictured above. It tasted like a Luden’s cough drop. Others, less charitably, said it was like Nyquil. None of us were able to drink enough to take advantage of any stimulant effects.

South Loop Club, 701 S. State, 312-427-2787