• Gates of Hades

Chicago winter is upon us and we’re back to scraping snow off our cars and wearing winter coats in our practice spaces; it’s not even that cold yet, but my brain has gone into hibernation or some sort of post-holiday food coma . . . and it seems I have a particularly brutal case of writer’s block, so I asked my “special friend” for advice on what to write for this episode of band life. Here’s what happened in our Gchat:

Dudepants: I think I may need to cut the fingers off some new gloves. It’s too fucking cold in the studio . . . It’s crazy cold.
me: You can buy fingerless gloves, you know.
Dudepants: Maybe I need to erect some sort of tent where the mixing board, computer and keyboards are. Like, I’ll have to leave the tent to play the drums . . . but just the drums.
me: You could build a pyramid. Hey, can you help me?
Dudepants: What do you need help with?
me: I need help figuring out what. The fuck. I’m going to write my blog post about.
Dudepants: hmm
Well . . .
Dudepants: god, I don’t know . . .
me: Maybe I should write about how you made a recording of your dishwasher. That’s what my brain sounds like right now.
Dudepants: You could write about drones. Or about what it is that makes former rock-types start recording drones instead of rock-type songs, but that’s a real can of worms.
me: Maybe I should write about how diminished chords used to be illegal.
Dudepants: Write about the Devil’s CHORD!!
me: SATAN!
Dudepants: No, seriously . . . that interval.
me: What is it exactly? A flatted fifth?
Dudepants: The beginning of Purple Haze. It’s a half step between a fourth and a fifth. It was apparently banned for a while from compositions by the Roman Catholic church.
me: Because of SATAN!
Dudepants: Or something like that.
god my fingers are so cold I can barely type
me: Do you know about the brown note?
Dudepants: ha . . .
Next question.
Why don’t you do it on iDRUGS!!
me: Do what? Play the brown note? On drugs?
Dudepants: No, the mp3s that make you HIIIIGH
me: Ohhh!! Hmm . . .
Dudepants: It’s old news by now: http://www.wired.com/threatlevel/2010/07/digital-drugs/ but still interesting.
me: That’s a good idea. Maybe I should experiment on myself and write about that?