No fuss, no tears, no memories.

The University of Chicago announced Friday it’s killing off the University of Chicago Chronicle. 

The university said its news office “launched the Chronicle 28 years ago as a way to speak directly to the University community, at a time when newspapers were a firmly established habit and print provided one of the most economical ways to reach a large number of people.”

Today they aren’t and it doesn’t. So na na na na, hey hey, goodbye!

“Intended for an audience of more than 27,000 faculty and staff members, students and friends,” said the university, as heedless of good grammar as cheap sentiment, “fewer than 4,000 copies of the Chronicle were picked up from the free drop boxes around campus and the neighborhood during each of three different samplings this spring.”

A new Web product will be rolled out in the fall.