It’s been a really boring week in blogville: I haven’t heard of one single new best band in the world this week, and the “Two Gallants get beat up and tasered by the Houston police” thing didn’t seem to have much staying power. So I guess it was just perfect timing for Ice-T to release the cover art for his new album, Gangsta Rap, which features a photo of him nude with his junk covered only by his also-nude stripper wife.
As much as I love and respect Ice-T for his contributions to music (“High Rollers” is still my jam) and film and television (the montage sequence in New Jack City where he makes crackhead Chris Rock exercise and cry is still my jam) I’m going to guess that the only reason anyone would pay attention to him putting out another record is some manufactured scandal like this. The record, for instance, is called Gangsta Rap, which either beat out I’m Ice-T and I’m Out of Ideas as a title or indicates some crazy impulse for Ice-T to stop doing metaphor and only using words to say exactly what things are. I’m kind of hoping for the latter, and that we’ll get an album that has lyrics like, “I used to be a pimp / I took money from men who wanted to have sex with my prostitutes / Now I don’t do that because I solve crimes on the TV.” If I was the Source I’d award him 14 mics for that.