The Reader‘s receptionists’ job description just expanded again. Here’s a transcript of a call fielded today by the patient Christina Martinez:

CALLER: You need to do a story about this. Obama is not a U.S. citizen and is therefore not entitled to run for president.

CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: Actually, sir, Barack Obama is a U.S. citizen.

CALLER: No, he was born in Kenya and never managed to get naturalized.

CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: Obama was born in Hawaii. His father was born in Kenya.

CALLER: You’re wrong, he was in Kenya. A great many sources support this. Look up a bulletin by Jon Christian Ryter from October 5, 2008. Behind the Headlines. Proof of Obama’s Citizenship contested. He was definitely in Kenya.

CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: He did not visit Kenya until he was an adult.

CALLER: OK, OK. Maybe he wasn’t born in Kenya. But he’s not American, either. He has Indonesian citizenship–did you know that?

CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: He lived in Indonesia for a few years as a kid, but that doesn’t mean he’s not an American citizen.
CALLER: Sure it does. He became an Indonesian when he moved there.

CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: When you are born in the U.S., you can keep your status as an American citizen even if you leave the country for years.

CALLER: How do you know that? You don’t know. How do you know?

CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: A close friend of mine is an American who moved to England five years ago. She’s a citizen of Great Britain, Italy, and the European Union, as well as the U.S. She’s voting in the upcoming election.
CALLER: No, you see, that’s not constitutional. The Supreme Court, they never said that.
CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: It’s called dual or multiple citizenship.

CALLER: That’s not legal. Not in this country. No, Obama’s not a citizen and if he gets elected this is gonna come out and a whole lot of people are gonna be really angry and it will have to be like he expired and McCain will be president. You’ll see.

CHRISTINA MARTINEZ: Thank you for calling with this information. I will make sure to pass it along to our editorial department. Have a nice day.


Whet adds: No, seriously. Pandagon has proof that Obama is totally a Kenyan citizen.