The Saint Louis alt-weekly Riverfront Times has just released several free-to-download Rod Blagojevich ring tones that—unlike those made available a few weeks ago by Springfield’s State Journal-Register—include all the F bombs. The new batch includes such Blago golden greats as “You know…they’re all fucking me . . . all these national fuckers, fuck you!” and “My upward trajectory is fucking stalled if not fucking terminally wounded.” Seriously, haven’t we all felt that way about our upward trajectories at some time or another? That’s our Blago, always swearing on behalf of the People of Illinois.

Blago is not the only controversial former governor/teevee star who will talk to you from your pockets. Sarah Palin will, too, if you let her.