• Frank Coconate

I’m sitting in the Lincoln Restaurant, stuffing my face with a feta-cheese-and-spinach omelet and a little Greek toast on the side—washed down with a tall, cool glass of chocolate milk.

Ah, delicious. Nothing quite as refreshing as a tall, cool glass of chocolate milk.

And best of all, it’s free. As in the guy sitting across the table is picking up the check.

Waitress—another round of chocolate milk. For the house!

That other guy is Frank Coconate, the internationally famous sex symbol, former city (now county) worker, and political operative.