Because I’ve written a bit on taco shells made from Doritos and pizza crusts stuffed with hot dogs, my managing editor, Jerome Ludwig, has for whatever reason appointed me to the weirdo-food-mutations beat. Fair enough. I enjoy waxing poetic on abominable fast-food cuisine that red-blooded Americans willingly ingest, regardless of how unhealthy and horrifying they may be. It’s our freedom of choice, our God-given right.
Well, the small southern California burger chain Slater’s 50/50—which lives by its 50-percent ground beef and 50-percent ground bacon burger—is celebrating the country’s independence by debuting a 100-percent ground bacon burger. And as if that wasn’t enough bacon to begin with, the damn thing is topped with a hearty slice of bacon, a sunny-side up egg, bacon island dressing, and bacon cheddar cheese. What’s it called? The ‘Merica Burger, obviously, and you can order it all this month.