For his New Year’s resolution, Mayor Emanuel has decided to confront what he perceives as his lone weakness: his tendency toward indelicate expression. Or, as the mayor himself has put it to confidantes: “I’d like to do something about my potty mouth.”

According to irreputable sources, the mayor informed his closest advisers of the resolution during a New Year’s Eve conference call from Buenos Aires, where he was vacationing with his family. “No more cussing for me, and I am not fudging kidding,” Emanuel said.