Producer Michael Bay reboots the 90s children’s franchise about gigantic, crime-fighting turtles. The lifeless characterizations and incoherent, spatially unsound CG fight scenes are on a par with Bay’s Transformers movies, while other aspects—the inert performances, the exposition-heavy dialogue, the flat digital cinematography—are actually worse. The light, comedic tone is weighed down by unimaginative pop-culture references and half-witted one-liners; a running gag in which one of the turtles makes awkward sexual advances toward the newswoman protagonist (Megan Fox) borders on creepy. Jonathan Liebesman directed; with Will Arnett and Whoopi Goldberg. 2014.