Every time I come here I’m reminded of the time I had one of my greatest brain movements. A brain movement is what happens when you enter the ladies’ loo after having consumed several pints and get a great idea. There are many places all over the city where I have brain movements. Anyway, we’re here one weekend sitting having the old pints and I go to the washroom and I have a brain movement. I was getting married, and I hate wedding cake. I’m Irish; in Ireland it’s nasty fruitcake with a nasty marzipan icing. I didn’t want that kind. I’d come to this country and I’d never seen a pinata, and I decided that I wanted a pinata at my wedding. My brain movement was that I would have a wedding cake pinata. I came out of the bathroom and discussed this whole thing with my girlfriend and there you have it. My friend Laura Carlson made it for me. It was three tiered and was filled with little eyeballs, condoms, naked men, playing cards, all that kind of stuff from Uncle Fun, every kind of crap that they have, and little bottles of booze. Instead of the cake cutting, the entire wedding party took turns smashing it with a baseball bat. I have some of my best brain movements while peeing.
–Liz Kavanaugh, international trade