I was here with a friend of mine also named Chris and we ran into another friend of mine named Chris. I always thought those two should get together at some point, and they ended up clicking that night. I decided to leave them alone and ended up going to another bar. About 5:30 in the morning I got a call from Chris Number One, who told me that after they left the club they were making out under the el tracks when all of a sudden they were held up at gunpoint. Both Chrises were pretty drunk by then, and when they turned around and saw that the guy holding them up had a red bandanna over his nose and mouth they started laughing and making comments like “What time’s the roundup?” and “Are you supposed to be the urban cowboy?” Then, without being asked, Chris Number One dug into his pants and offered the masked bandit 50 cents, saying, “We’re broke but do you want this at least?” The guy was so flustered by their reaction that he waved them away. So off they rode into the sunrise.

–Chris Zimowski, bartender