January 8, 1986

(Excuse me, I mean January 8, 1996)

To the Distinguished Critic Peter Margasak:

Please allow me to state (with utmost sincerity) that you, Critic Peter Margasak, embody a rare and unfortunate type of human being (and I use the term lightly)–the sort that if actually found alone with a rooftop view at sunset, would have absolutely nothing to say. Nothing good, anyway [Spot Check, January 5]. But there are people who can help. People like me. I’d love to share that rooftop view with you someday. Just the two of us. Then perhaps you’d understand how truly sensitive a guy can be. My God. At this very moment I’m getting all fucking misty just thinking about sharing a ledge with you.

The fact is, Pete, I could never deny you the right to express your opinions and critiques, however mean-spirited and misguided. But at least I can say my critiques are aimed at myself. Aimed at my own career–my own demons–my own life. As opposed to, say, my being paid to proliferate a smug and malicious agenda aimed at a public quite capable of making its own judgments and forming its own opinions. I could never embrace a livelihood rooted in ill-informed and/or biased critiques of another’s livelihood. (Maybe I’m too sensitive.)

This knowledge helps me sleep soundly on that rare occasion when I’m not up all night, staring at the ceiling from my bed o’ nails, all “quavery”-voiced, devising new and improved methods of “sensitive-guy pretension” to add to my ever-enlarging “melodramatic lump.”

But, alas, I forget my place: I am but a poor wounded sparrow cowering in the vast shadow of your monstrous talons. Please have mercy upon my fledgling soul. (You know how sensitive I am.) I’ll think of you at dusk.


Jeff Rawwin


PS: Thanks for the review of our dusty old EP Ghost Circus! I can’t believe it’s been ten years. Tempus fugit.

PPS: If in the future you decide to review our current EP, A Carbon Experiment? (released 10/85–er, I mean 10/95), please don’t hold back. Let your public know how you really feel.