Keep your eye on the thin line

This is Class. This is Crass.

William Singer’s 15th school visit. William Singer’s 115th school visit.

WMAQ firing Sweet Dick Burch. WMAQ hiring Jerry G. Bishop to replace him.

Ratso’s booking. Ratso’s cooking.

Tattoos. Body art.

Getting caught taking an under-the-table insurance deal from your father. Getting caught on your real estate test.

Old Chicago Dark. Old Chicago Light.

Being attacked by Aaron Gold. Being praised by Aaron Gold.

Mean Mary Jean. Melody Rogers.

Watching Lord Peter Wimsey on Sunday nights. Watching Upstairs, Downstairs on Sunday nights.

Watching Upstairs, Downstairs on Sunday nights. Talking about Upstairs, Downstairs on Monday mornings.

The Stadium. The Amphitheatre.

“blacks.” “Blacks.”

Waiting ’til it comes to the Bryn Mawr. Waiting ’til it comes to the Playboy All Night.

A radio station with all women disc jockeys. WSDM.

Doonesbury. Funky Winkerbean.

Tocqueville’s America. Alistair Cooke’s America.

Lake Point Towers. Harbor Point.

Evel Knievel. John Glenn.

Mike LaVelle’s column in the Tribune. Mike LaVelle’s behavior in public.

The Playboy Interview. The Playboy Philosophy.

Cuck Tanner’s Chevy commercial. Dick Butkus’ Stereo City commercial.

The Klunk Letter of the Day. The B.S. Horoscope.

Kennedy at Night starring John Coleman. Kennedy at Night Starring Bob Kennedy.

Bozo the clown. John Coleman.

Buying Jet magazine on the el. Buying hare Krishna incense on the el.

Cushioned toilet seats. Plaid cushioned toilet seats.

A story about Cybill Shepherd and Peter Bogdaovich. A story about Cybill and Peter.

The L.A.. Free Press with sex. The L.A Free Press without sex.

Oak Park. Oak Brook.

Geraldo Rivera, newsman. Geraldo Rivera, talk show host.

Subscribing to Chicago Guide. Reading it.

“My bicycle.” “My 10-speed.”

Dan Walker. Dan Walker.

The Lawson YMCA. The McClurg Court Sports Center.

The Michigan Dunes. The Indiana Dunes.

Picking up a guy at the Lawson YMCA. Picking up a girl at the McClurg Court Sports Center.

Hot Nasties ads. Hot Nasties.

Tribune “Column 1.” Sun-Times “Top Line.”

Shopping bags. Plastic shopping bags.

Getting the New York Times on Sunday. Getting the New York Times every day.

South side policy wheels. The Illinois State Lottery.

The Chicago Public Library building. The Chicago Public Library.

Red hots. Deep-dish pizza.

Salvation Army Santas. Process Church panhandlers.

University of Chicago students. University of Chcago grad students.

Abe Gibron’s phlebitis. Richard Nixon’s phlebitis.

George Plimpton as “Paper Lion.” Bob Greene as “Billion Dollar Baby.”

Tribune Magazine inviting Gael Greene to review Chicago restaurants. Abra Anderson inviting herself to review New York restaurants.

Coors. Burgie.

Grain Belt. Coors.

The Pro Se Divorce. The $99 Divorce.

Young writers. Youth writers.

One effete monthly magazine. Two effete monthly magazines.

Two effete monthly magazines. Two effete monthly magazines owned by the same effete radio station.