Chicago aldermen–who are paid extraordinary yearly salaries of $85,000 for part-time legislative work–obviously don’t have enough to do. Over the years aldermen have gone on famously useless crusades. Who could forget, for example, the wall Bernard Stone envisioned between Chicago and Evanston to prevent shopping traffic on Howard Street from spilling over into the 50th Ward? This year was no exception for aldermanic busybodies. Ed Burke pulled off the silliest campaign in years when he called for hearings to determine whether the fighting on Jerry Springer was fake. Appearing before the Police and Fire Committee on June 4, Springer said, “Nobody watches our show and says, ‘That’s behavior that everyone’s going to love.'” The same could be said about this year’s City Council meetings. Several other aldermen also pursued consequential objectives, though they got far less publicity than Burke. Well, now’s their chance for glory. Can you guess which alderman crusaded for which ordinance? (Hint: one especially persnickery north-sider is the answer to four.)

Art accompanying story in printed newspaper (not available in this archive): photos/Jim Newberry/Zuno Photographic Studios.