January 27, 12:15 AM, 2400 block of North Lincoln. Criminal damage to property. Two guys outside bar were mooning patrons. They slammed butts against window, which shattered. Manager chased offenders and caught one. Police arrived and arrested him.

February 3, 5:25 PM, 900 block of West Addison. Robbery. Man snatched $10 bill from elderly man attempting to buy CTA pass at el stop. Victim attempted to stop him, but offender wrestled him to ground. Bystander detained offender until police arrived. Offender told police, “I didn’t have money. He did have money. So I took his money.” He then said that he’d swallowed 40 pills before robbery and needed medical attention. Offender was taken to hospital.

February 4, 7:40 PM, 300 block of West Chestnut. Attempted robbery. Man approached parking-garage attendant and showed him gun. Attendant said, “If that’s a real gun, then shoot me.” Offender fled.

February 12, 11:20 PM, 11000 block of South Kedzie. Aggravated battery. Intoxicated man had to go to bathroom. Burger King was closed, so he went in garbage can near library. Police caught him and he became belligerent. When they placed him in squad car, man head-butted officer, grabbed hold of her finger, bit off tip, and spat it on floor. Officer was taken to hospital.

–Neal Pollack