July 16, 8 PM, 600 block of West Surf. Burglary. Man broke window of car and removed garage-door opener, which he subsequently used to get into car owner’s garage. He took phone, bike, three bottles of beer, and opener and fled.

July 16, 9 PM, 5400 block of South Cornell. Battery. Man came home to find son sitting at kitchen table. He asked son why he wasn’t at work. According to police, son gave a “smart reply.” Father and son exchanged words, during which father told boy to “get off your ass.” Son said, “That’s what your ass is for, to sit on.” Man said, “I’ll cut your ass for you,” and proceeded to chase son around kitchen with butter knife. Father then stabbed son in ass. Son ran out of house and called police. Father wasn’t charged. Son refused medical treatment.

July 21, 1 PM, 6000 block of North Mason. Theft. Woman looked out window and saw construction workers taking white stones, worth $500, from yard. She confronted workers, who said they were working on cement walkway next door and that they’d replace stones later. Woman was not satisfied and called neighbor, who refused to release contractor’s name. Woman videotaped workers and handed tape over to detectives. Investigation continues without arrests.

July 27, 6:20 PM, 6300 block of North Washtenaw. Noncriminal damage to property. Police officer responded to burglar alarm at residence. Upon arrival he was confronted by large, snarling dog. Officer fired gun, damaging back door of house. Dog and officer escaped uninjured.

–Neal Pollack