January 8, 6:30 AM, 900 block of East 54th. Theft. Frozen meat stolen from elementary school cafeteria, including 20 pounds of chicken parts, 20 pounds of ground beef, and 20 pounds of Canadian bacon.

January 16, 10:15 pm, 2800 block of West 65th. Robbery. Man with gun held up pizza deliveryman, taking $38 and two large pizzas valued at $29. When police arrived at the crime scene they saw three men eating pizza in a car. Police found the receipt for the stolen pizza and a toy gun in the car. They charged one man with armed robbery, one with possession of stolen property, and released the third.

January 30, 11:10 pm, 11000 block of S. Parnell. Criminal damage to property. Following an argument at a friend’s house, a woman pulled a toilet out of a wall. Police reports said the woman is five-four and weighs 259 pounds.

January 31, early morning, 9300 block of S. Ashland. Theft. Perpetrator stole air-conditioning unit from the roof of a thrift store. The temperature that night was minus 10.

–Neal Pollack