Thursday, November 20, 12:15 AM

Dispatcher: 1133, 1133?

1133: 1133.

Dispatcher: 1133, good morning. I’m gonna start you with this–42– Fillmore in the alley, fire’s requesting an assist, what you’ll do when you get there, I don’t know. And here’s the story–says fire’s requesting the police, got a man in the alley with a rat up him. In essence, what the guy was doin’, he was whizzin’ in the alley and the rat ran up his pants. Now he’s got the rat caught in his pant leg.

1133: Ten-four.

Dispatcher: You know, is that a rat in your pants or are you just happy to see me, you know?

1133: All right, we’ll take a look. Where’s that at?

Dispatcher: 42– on Fillmore.

1133: Gotta go look at that.

Unidentified caller: They comin’ to assist the rat or the person?

Dispatcher: OK. All right, I got a second call says now there’s a naked man in front sayin’ that there’s a rat in his–oh man. 33, I’m gonna send this to ya, if you care to share it, it’s up to you…sounds like a job for a good proctologist, I’ll tell ya.

Thursday, November 20, 12:25 AM

Unidentified caller: Did the rat get the crack he was lookin’ for?

Dispatcher: It’ll probably have to be surgically removed from the rat, huh?

Unidentified caller Number TWo: I smell a rat.

Unidentified caller Number three: Direction of flight on the rat?

Unidentified caller Number TWo: Direction was straight up.

Thursday, November 20, 1:00 AM

New Dispatcher: 1133? This guy’s all right?

1133: Yeah, no rat to be found.

New Dispatcher: I miss all the good fun.