Category: Police Scanner & Petty Crime

Monday, April 14, 12:45 AM Unidentified caller: Jesus Christ, where’s fire? Unidentified caller number two: Those poor firemen got to wipe the sleep from their eyes. Unidentified caller number three: Got to catch up on their rest. Unidentified caller number four: (singing) Oh, the fireman is your friend… Dispatcher: It’s karaoke night. Unidentified caller number […]

Sunday, March 16, 11:45 PM 1022: 1022, emergency! Dispatcher: 22, go ahead. Units stand by. 22 an emergency, go ahead. 1022: Car just took off, he’s westbound on Douglas, might have a weapon, and it’s a gray–think he just turned northbound–he’s speeding northbound on Homan, gray Monte Carlo, plate of B–. Dispatcher: Northbound Douglas and […]

Tuesday, February 4, 9:10 PM Unidentified caller: Guilty, guilty, guilty, guilty. O.J. Simpson is found liable. Dispatcher: Make sure that’s bona fide, and if that’s the verdict, make sure you use extreme caution. If anyone sees anything suspicious like large crowds gathering, put it out on the air right away, and if we have to […]

Thursday, January 9, 11:15 PM Dispatcher: 1046, would you look at a domestic at 13– South Independence, apartment 1-E. There’s no name, it’s a domestic, and the caller asked for the police. The phone was hung up, we called back, caller said they do not need the police but someone in the background was yelling […]

December 29, 7:30 pm, Illinois and Dearborn. Aggravated assault. Man walked into fire station demanding to be fed. Firemen refused, saying it was against policy. Man became irate, started screaming obscenities, and pulled out eight-inch bowie knife. Firemen threatened to call police, and man left. January 7, 12:30 pm, 3900 Block of West 64th Place. […]

Wednesday, December 11, 11:40 AM Dispatcher: Anyone who had their car parked in front of the station–somebody plowed into ’em, they’re all messed up. If your car was parked in front of the station, call in. We don’t need to give plates or anything, you know who you are. Call in. 1014: Them boys are […]

Tuesday, November 19, 11:30 PM Dispatcher: Got a person, possibly inebriated, ran into a pole. Are you alone in the car? Unidentified caller: Just me and the good Lord. Dispatcher: OK, you and the good Lord take a look at this drunk with the pole. Saturday, November 23, 11:30 PM Dispatcher: Unit in the area, […]

Friday, October 11, 2 am 1873: Any units on the scene at 850 N. Michigan or inside, leave the premises now. The K-9 puppies are on the scene–they’ll be coming in shortly. Get out of the premises or you’ll be dog food. Unidentified caller: All they’ll do is take a little nibble. Another unidentified caller: […]

Monday, September 16, 11:55 PM 1142: 142. Three things. One, we have a subject stopped whose heart is beating like a drum and his first words out of his mouth is “I’m not runnin’ from the police.” Two, can we get a description of who we’re chasin’? And three, does 1414 know where these guys […]

Tuesday, August 27, 8:15 PM Dispatcher: Somebody go over to 33 W. Kinzie, that’s Harry Caray’s Restaurant. They have a bomb threat, a bomb threat faxed to the restaurant. Says it’s five pages and has sender’s name and phone number on it. Unidentified caller: Squad, was the name ______ and did it say “boom” at […]

Wednesday, July 17, 1:05 AM Dispatcher: 944, there’s a disturbance, 164 E. 35th Street, says a Mr. Askew will be in front. You know what? That’s comin’ up the second district. That on nine side? 944: [Unintelligible]…el station…[unintelligible]. Dispatcher: 944, could you repeat that? 944: El station…[unintelligible]. Dispatcher: OK. That’s the second district? 944: Nine…[unintelligible]. […]

MONDAY, JULY 1, 11:50 PM DISPATCHER: 1343 coming in. 1343: Did someone call us a wagon? UNIDENTIFIED CALLER: You’re a wagon. 1343: Ha-ha. Very much appreciate it. We need transport for an individual to the morgue. DISPATCHER: As soon as the wagon comes out, we’ll send ’em over. 1343: Ma’am, we need a medical examiner […]

Thursday, June 6, 12:15 AM Dispatcher: 1042, 1042? 1042, 1042? 1042. 1042, 1042? 1042: Four-deuce, squad. I’m trying to patch up a broken heart at Cermak and Albany, but whattayou got? Dispatcher: Oh man, I’m in tears. Robbery victim, 1556 on Pulaski in the snack shop. See complainant–he’s very disoriented. 1042: Yeah, I’m sure he […]

Dispatcher: 1143, take this assault, if you would. Complainant says the gang members are waiting outside to beat him up. Can you believe it? Ten carloads of gangbangers to kick his ass! 1143: Ten-four. Dispatcher: They’re gonna kick his ass….OK, we’re gonna go right down the line with this nonsense. 1171, one-one-seven-one? 1171: 71. Dispatcher: […]

DISPATCHER: Those units that are patrolling the area of the blackout, have your Mars lights turned on while you’re in that area of the blackout. Turn on your Mars lights so the residents can see the squad cars, in case they need you, I guess. UNIDENTIFIED CALLER: Make us an easy target. ANOTHER UNIDENTIFIED CALLER: […]