If that were true, we couldn’t lift it. From a recent promotional letter: “His book covers the complete overview of the field of communication from the beginning of time to the far, far future.”

Percentage of listings in the Chicago Area Daycare and Preschool Guide that are outside of Chicago: 63.

Bleak House. “Water from melting snow on the health center’s roof has seeped into fireproofing and ceiling tiles that contain asbestos.É The chemistry and physics building[‘s leaky roof] has been another entirely different problem. And the bricks falling off the 16-story tower of our Holmes Student Center are another kind of problem.” So says John LaTourette, president of Northern Illinois University at De Kalb. “The phrase ‘hard times’ doesn’t quite cover just how badly the lack of adequate funding has hurt so many of our once very proud public universities not just in Illinois, but all over the Midwest. We’re going to watch them crumble around us just like the soggy ceiling tiles….If our Midwestern legislatures don’t reverse the harder and harder times at our public universities, we’re going to have a tale of two cultures: the rich, well-educated coastal states that are spending money to prepare the next generation for the 21st century; and, the poor, crumbling Heartland that’s not unlike the gloomy, harsh society portrayed by Dickens.”

How can you avoid an audit? One way is to keep your income down. According to the Illinois CPA Society, “In 1987, a non-itemizing taxpayer earning between $10,000 and $25,000 had a 64-in-10,000 chance of an audit. For taxpayers earning over $50,000, the odds shot to 224 out of 10,000 similar returns.”

The Women’s Film Festival of Chicago distributed no awards to any of the 78 films and videos shown recently, according to director Nancy Partos, because “we felt that recognizing ‘winners’ would perpetuate a submissive or dominant attitude and thereby create sexism” (Loyola World, March 2). We look forward to the day when presidential elections get the same treatment.

“Just as weak King Henry VI of England was unable to prevent a factional war among the feudal lords in the fifteenth century, a weak Mayor Sawyer has let loose petty, bickering factions in the City Council,” write former alderman Dick Simpson and seven collaborators in The War of the Roses: The Unusual City Council Roll Call Votes From March 30-November 30, 1988. “Because of factionalism aldermen voted against routine resolutions congratulating couples on their 50th wedding anniversaries…. Instead of two major factions–say, the Evans and Sawyer factions as the Council divided the night that the Mayor was elected by the City Council–the City Council has splintered into multiple factions. Aldermen vote against measures because of petty personal reasons, race, self-interest, or merely to vote against proposals presented by opposing bloc Aldermen.” But not because of mayoral politics. Simpson and company found that Alderman Evans supported Sawyer 85 percent of the time; Bloom 78 percent of the time; and Huels (read Daley) 86 percent of the time.

Wellness for cows. From a U. of I. press release: “The veterinarian wants to be viewed as a herd health consultant, not just a person who delivers emergency care.”

“Though there are notable exceptions such as Saucedo Magnet, Benito Juarez and Clemente schools, for the most part Latino parents do not participate in school activities that can affect the education of their children,” writes Graciela Kenig in Latino (January 1989), the quarterly newsletter of the Latino Institute. This could make school reform hard to implement in the Hispanic community. She quotes Esther Nieves, executive director of the Chicago Commission on Latino Affairs: “Culturally, Latinos have been brought up to respect authority figures. Latino parents are more likely to be intimidated by the principal or the teachers and may not be comfortable making important issues a priority on their school councils.”

Those new property-tax assessments just might be fair to Lincoln Park after all, suggests ONE Reports (Winter 1988) in a report on a study of sales prices and assessments in Lincoln Park, Uptown, and Edgewater. County assessor’s records for 1985 showed that buildings with one to seven units in Uptown and Edgewater had significantly higher assessments compared with their sales prices than did similar buildings to the south. “Lincoln Park seems to be paying proportionally lower property taxes than Uptown/ Edgewater.”

Art accompanying story in printed newspaper (not available in this archive): illustration/Carl Kock.