After reading “Two Reasons to Ignore Bob Dole” in the June 16 edition of the Hitsville column it has become apparent that it’s truly time for the Reader to consider pulling the plug on the insufferable Bill Wyman. One would have to search long and hard to find a column that exhibits such long-winded, pseudointellectual mumbo jumbo on a consistent basis.

It was difficult enough to suffer Wyman as the servile toady, tirelessly championing Liz Phair in an embarrassing and transparent attempt to get a whiff of Winnetka pussy. Apparently, as Phair’s star is rapidly (and thankfully) on the decline, Wyman needs to reposition himself as the deep thinker of Wicker Park.

So now we get Wyman wading into the arenas of psychology and social criticism, offering up steaming piles of doo-doo and trite, spuriously simple outlooks on complex social issues. All delivered in that distinctly Wymanian smugness. Spare us!

All we can gather from Wyman’s use of the term “cognitive dissonance” is that college boy was taking notes in Psych 101 class. He should stick to what he is good at: writing studied, hyperbolic columns chronicling the every action of the overrated, no-talent slacker bands clogging up the music scene in 1995. Yawn.

Lane Claven

Oak Park

Bill Wyman replies:

I don’t live in Wicker Park.