To the editors:

After reading last week’s review of Beirut by Tom Boeker [January 20] I feel compelled to write this semi-anonymous letter to the attention of Mr. Boeker and any reader who has ever been insulted by his reviews. I say that this letter is semi-anonymous because all that I will say about myself is that I am the Artistic Director of an off-off-loop not-for-profit theater which Mr. Boeker has reviewed several times to both good and bad notices.

Mr. Boeker, after reading your description of Alan Bowne (Playwright of Beirut) as “a dickhead,” I would like to go on notice with this warning: The next time you set foot into my theater, you will be thrust to center stage, mid-show, and held up to public ridicule. Believe me, there are plenty of actors and intelligent theatergoers who would like nothing more than to see you get yours live on stage. Everyone in the audience on the night you “open” will have an evening of theater they will never forget. I want you to know that I don’t know Mr. Bowne (though I did see and have mixed reactions to Beirut), but I have had enough of your mean-spirited and insulting reviews and I now feel it’s time to strike back. Mr. Boeker, I don’t wish syphilis on you, as you did on Alan Bowne, but I do hope that every time you walk into a theater to review a show, you’ll wonder whether it will be your night to shine.

I will keep my word and will review the “performance” in this column at a later date.

An Artistic Director TBA