To Bill Wyman,

“Alternative-Rock Tipsheet” [Hits- ville, February 24] was most amusing. It goes to further prove your lack of music knowledge. You say that our band could represent the “end of rock music as we know it.” First of all, we don’t play “rock music,” we play alternative rock. Learn the difference. Secondly, a lot of people really dig our music. A music critic in a large Greenwich Village newspaper described us as “the next Nirvana.” You’re going to feel really stupid when we do get successful and you’ll be begging us for an interview. If we were an all-girl band and sang about blowjobs then you’d love us, because you just want the free kisses. The only free kisses you’re going to get from the Lupins is a kiss goodbye.

Stoley the Cartoon Boy